Michelle, 06.07.07 6 pm HST •

1) post your picture,
2) become a male.,

Alo'ha,
404 guy •

It's Great to Be a Man - Your last name stays put. The garage is all mine. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut. hell; The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky. Wrinkles add character. Wedding Dress $5000; Tux rental $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

I love being a guy; New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle my feet. One mood, ALL the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You can open all your own jars.

It's Great to Be a Man - Men look just fine without makeup.

We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend. Our underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. We can buy our shirts without having to try them on.

If you are 34 and single, nobody notices. We can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

We don't have to clean the apartment if ppl are coming.

It's Great to Be a Man - We can quietly watch a game with a buddy for hours without thinking: "He must be mad at me".

You don't mooch off other's desserts.

It's Great to Be a Man - You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.

Men; You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

It's Great to Be a Man - You almost never have strap problems in public.

It's Great to Be a Man - We are unable to see wrinkles in our clothes.

It's Great to Be a Man - We don't have to shave below our necks. Our belly usually hides our 'big hips.' One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.

It's Great to Be a Man - We can do our nails with a pocketknife. We have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. WE can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.

I am working on finetuning my empath and intuitive abilities as well. It is a long road to finding balance. I suggest posting your question to other tribes where you'll get assistance rather than jokes. Try Maine Pagans and SamhainDell for local resources and I am the Goddess tribe for global.

Blessings,
Raven